As many of you know, this is not exactly where I am at age 26. Rather than settled into my job, I'm just starting year two (which as a teacher is still a huge time of learning and figuring things out). While I am married, Devin and I are still "newlyweds" and baby number one is due to arrive around Thanksgiving. The cause of this change from the original "track" I thought my life was on... God's plan won out. His plan was not a job and Vocation right out of college, but rather an amazing adventure as a missionary.
When I was discerning FOCUS during my senior year at NDSU, I remember sometimes feeling like saying yes and giving 2 years of my life to the mission would be putting my life and dreams and plans on pause. Now, 3 1/2 years after making that decision to follow God's plan instead of mine, I more fully see that FOCUS was in no way a pause, but rather an opportunity to live life more fully. I can't imagine my life in any other way. Instead of worrying about what I would have to wait for or give up by not having my Vocation and career right away, I am able now to see all that I have gained. During that birthday morning rosary, I realized that I am not "already 26", I am "only 26" with a lot of incredible life lived (and of course, many incredible things to come).
If I hadn't allowed God to change my plans, I would not be the person I am today and I would not have had the incredible opportunities that I have had. Here are a few ways that FOCUS didn't pause my life, but rather made it all the more wonderful:
1. Getting outside my comfort zone - from finally moving out of my hometown, to spending 2 weeks in Guyana on mission, my time with FOCUS really taught me how to step outside what was familiar and comfortable. Now I know that I am not back in Fargo because I can't thrive elsewhere, but rather that I am here because God wants me here - it's not just a default.
2. Learning to truly trust - between fundraising my full salary and going on a year long dating fast while most of my peers were getting married and having babies, my trust in God was challenged and grew in many ways. Now, whenever I catch myself having doubts about the future, I have these experiences to fall back on and prove to me that I can trust God's plan.
3. Being ready for marriage - God knew that I needed more time to be ready for my vocation, and He saw that good that would come from how that extra time would allow my friendship with Devin to blossom into an incredible love story. We both were ready when the timing was right, and now we get to experience an incredible life together!
4. Landing my dream job - teaching math at my former Catholic school was always the dream, but the reality in spring 2012 as I finished college was that they didn't need a math teacher yet. 2 years later as I moved back from Duluth, my job at Sullivan was open and ready! Not only that, but having a couple more years under my belt helps give a bit more of an age buffer between me and my students - not such a bad thing with challenging middle school classroom management situations.
Of course, I could probably share many more ways that God has shown me that He has never put my life on pause, but I have a few other projects to get to yet today. John 10:10 is so true - "I came that they might have life, and have it to the full." God's plan added fullness to my life, not just in the moments I had as a missionary, but also in the present as a wife, mom to be, and teacher. The message I hope this helps to share is that God always knows what He is doing, and saying Yes to Him might change the plans you had, but only for the better. For all you college students and high school students in particular... ask God what His timeline is for you and don't be afraid to do something different if that's where He calls you, He always knows best :)
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